Date: 07 Jul 2009 20:36 Title: Final Flight of the starship Venture
That was totally horrific. The brutality of the attacks, the viciousness of the killings combined to stun the reader. I need to read January McKenna, I guess to get a feel for the AU. Great job!
Date: 04 Jul 2009 07:45 Title: Final Flight of the starship Venture
Geez, that was brutal. You gave us just enough time and detail to grow attached to these characters before snuffing them in a ghoulish shooting gallery. The battle sequence was taut, engaging, and fast paced. The crew of the Venture went down swinging, that much is certain.
That reminds me of the quote Picard repeated to Data after he lost his game of Stratagema. "Sometimes it's possible to do everything right... and still lose."
This was one helluva First Contact. Nicely done.
Date: 03 Jul 2009 22:39 Title: Final Flight of the starship Venture
Within a very short story you managed to introduce a varied and diverse crew with different personalities and of different species. This is something that can be taken for granted but your story here is a simple lesson in the how to do so and to do so with great effect and an economy of words.
Especially, when one considers you did so before then quickly throwing our heroes into the fire with a brutal and chaotic attack.
The attack itself was conveyed very well. Everyone was caught off-guard and this resulted in confusion and even some cross purposes. Very real feeling. Very chaotic and confused. On top of which, the attackers were mysterious and unknown and apart from your opening blurb and the armour clue I wouldn't have been sure who the enemy was. Particularly, with red herrings of the Borg past, near Rihansu space, head for the Badlands - so maybe Cardassian and of course when dealing with cloaks always be prepared for Klingons [albeit not so much in this AU if I remember correctly]. So cleverly done and to great effect.
This has refreshed my memory of the Jenna McKenna AU but I think I really ought to go and repay it a visit. Last time I read it was over at Hope Station or the Trek Guild. So a good bit back now. Hadn't read this though, and I was suitably impressed by how much you got into one little story.
That said Janoski is a pale version of Ariel. She is and will always be the best femme fatal. I wonder, was she a precursor to the character?