Date: 22 Feb 2015 16:45 Title: Chapter Ten
Oh man, that was kinda harsh. For a moment there Selik thought that he wasn't alone in his cruel fate only to learn that no, actually, Kircheis was doing fine, was being wined and dined in fact while he was being brutally assaulted.
I'm curious about CJ's future. Looks like that promotion and new assignment lasted a lot shorter than anyone expected. I'm still convinced she'd love another chance of sitting in a captain's chair. After all she's done a pretty decent job in the brief time she was Adelphi's acting captain.
Date: 22 Feb 2015 16:41 Title: Chapter Nine
The ordeal is over. In the end only one person really suffered here. Good think poor Selik is a Vulcan. Sure he's broken and devastated inside, no doubt, but time will heal this wound for him. And outwardly you'd probably never know what has been done to him.
As for CJ, she's made a new friend. Or possibly more? Of course getting struck hard in the face is normally not a good start to any relationship. Regardless, I wouldn't be surprised at all if their paths crossed again in the future.
Date: 22 Feb 2015 16:36 Title: Chapter Eight
Saw this coming but probably not when we first started out.
It's very interesting that the sexual assault here is reversed from what you would normally expect. That's cleverly done.
The reasoning behind Evaste's actions, and the importance Vulcans seem to have in Romulan society, seems a bit odd to me. I suppose different cultures have different ways of thinking, I can respect that.
There must be other ways for Evaste to impregnate herself, especially in the 24th century, which means that she thoroughly enjoys violating and humiliating pure Selik in this manner. This, is one sick lady.
Date: 22 Feb 2015 16:27 Title: Chapter Seven
That's an awkward position to be in for CJ. I mean here she is, fully aware that she has nothing to fear from her captor and yet she is unable to communicate any of this to her loyal crew. Tough spot. But hey, it could be a lot worse.
Actually it just might get worse. Evaste seems to have her mind set of going after Selik. In the worst possible way.
Date: 22 Feb 2015 16:23 Title: Chapter Six
Things are becoming a lot clearer now. At least as far as the connection between Kircheis and Taibek is concerned. Romulans seem to take their family extremely seriously, maybe even more so then the Cardassians do, for Taibek to risk turning against his own people and side with a human instead. Not to mention the commander of the starship which killed his own captain and most of his flotilla.
Kircheis' reaction is priceless though. Believing herself in mortal danger of torture and worse one moment to instead find herself in the care of an unexpected, and charming, ally instead.
Oh, and it appears to be a bad day to be a Vulcan.
Date: 22 Feb 2015 16:18 Title: Chapter Five
Okay things have taken an odd turn with CJ and her small group of crew-members finding themselves Romulan prisoners. And it looks like there's no place she can go these days without unwelcome eyes gobbling her up.
Taibek may have some other intentions here. The prologue comes back to mind; there is a connection here. I have to admit that I don't recall Kircheis' history and the circumstances of her affiliation with the Romulans but it seems fairly significant.
Date: 22 Feb 2015 16:11 Title: Chapter Four
Oh wow, Adelphi's a tough little ship. The Ambassador class is an old design, I would have thought she'd be minced meat against 3 warbirds for sure. Well, she still ends up that way in the end, but not before taking a few Romulans with her. Not the direction I was expecting things to go, with Toomey finding a quick death and Adelphi's story seemingly coming to an end.
Date: 22 Feb 2015 16:08 Title: Chapter Three
Oh yeah, Toomey is bad news, all around.
Taibek is right, it's Starfleet standard procedure to at least try to talk with the other side, even if their motives are clear. Toomey will have hell to pay for playing the role of the aggressor here. CJ is helpless to stop this train wreck in the making and I wonder about Toomey's motivations. Is she just a bad captain or are there some personal reasons at work?
Date: 22 Feb 2015 16:05 Title: Chapter Two
Okay this crew is giving me all kinds of warning signs. Toomey seemed like a needlessly strict disciplinarian but perhaps a decent captain at first. Now I'm not so sure, not with an apparently racist crew, and officers like Carneiro who don't seem fit to wear the uniform. Not to mention her odd two-faced persona.
And now the Romulans? Bad tidings, I fear.
Date: 20 Feb 2015 10:05 Title: Chapter One
Interesting developments here. CJ gets a promotion and with that ... loses her command to become an XO on a larger ship. I might not make use of that same rigid military logic in my own work but I suppose it does make a certain amount of sense. Even though it's hard to imagine any officer who has tasted the freedom of being in command of her own vessel, even if just a small escort, being truly satisfied of playing second fiddle on a larger ship. I suppose what keeps you going is hoping for that next promotion and returning to the center seat.
Toomey is interesting and most definitely not your typical Starfleet captain. I think this is going to be a very interesting, eye-opening assignment for CJ.
Date: 13 Feb 2015 19:12 Title: Prologue
Though I'm not familiar with these characters, you made them come to life with this well-written prologue. A beautiful balance of dialogue and action. I like your use of "House" to describe family relationships. And of course I am curious about the term "Tal Priax breeder". Sounds of bit demeaning, but perhaps it's considered an honor in that culture.
Date: 11 Feb 2015 22:54 Title: Chapter Four
Hardly a great day for Kircheis, but she did everything she could. There will be some sort of inquiry, undoubtedly, and Toomey's lucky to be dead - I imagine it would be a court martial for sure.
Do they make it? I suppose that's a question for another story.
Well done but there are a ton of introductions within the body of the story. I realize you had a lot of people to bring in but it did feel a bit like there was a lot of handshaking going on.