Date: 25 May 2014 16:39 Title: The Key
I love, love, love stories like these that are missing scenes. And although I'm less familiar with TOS than the other Treks it always seems it offers up some of the richest opportunities for such exploration and you mined it for all its worth to produce an excellent piece. It is a great addition to the Kelvins drama but it is also a fascinating look at Kirk and McCoy and how they shore one another up at times. I like that McCoy is almost abrasive and hard but only so much as to remind Kirk of all the good they have done, all the promise they offer. And despite his seemingly harsh words, McCoy has heart under it all.
Lastly, it can only be said that McCoy's words are not only kind and wise, they are believe me only far too true. At a time of mourning there is never going to be sufficient words or any kind that will offer true comfort. However, it is the kindness of strangers, the kind words and the fond memories of the lost child that can sustain as much as they break the heart. Thank you for a touching scene.
Date: 06 Dec 2013 21:22 Title: The Key
You really know how to knock a short story out of the park. You really, really nailed McCoy's dialogue style; I could hear De Kelley saying that stuff. And you really nailed Kirk's mix between oddly vulnerable and compulsive action, too. You made me laugh out loud, and you also gave quite a jerk on my heartstings; this line, in particular, kind of pulled me apart:
"So send another one." McCoy downed the rest of his drink and grabbed his laser-suture again, beckoning for Kirk to give him his injured hand again. "There's no such thing as a shortage of kind words for a mourning parent."
I mean, damn. Just. Damn. Way to absolutely nail the point home, succinctly and neatly. No wasted words, no melodrama, just unfettered reality.
Seriously, excellent story here.
Date: 05 Dec 2013 15:22 Title: The Key
Nicely done TS, this is an excellent piece of TOS. You capture the strength of the Kirk and McCoy relationship and also Kirk conscious about the lost of the young yeoman to the Kelvans.
Was good to see McCoy to mention the Mirror Kirk in response to the Shoot to kill statement. You get Dr. McCoy to shine not just as a good doctor and bartender as well as a friend.
Date: 28 Nov 2013 18:28 Title: The Key
Very well done. This death in that episode bothered me for the very reasons you cite - she wasn't someone from Security whose job it was to put her life on the line, she was just the captain's yeoman, who happened to be in the wrong place at the wrong time. I can so see where this death could be singled out from the myriad of others, and would haunt Kirk more than the others did - even though we know he felt every death keenly. Shatner may not have been the best at some things, but there is a scene early on in Devil in the Dark where a guard from security is burned to a crisp. Everyone else walks away, but Kirk kneels beside what's left of the body, and the look on his face says it all. We saw a similar look in this episode.
The voices of Kirk and McCoy were spot-on, as was the sudden burst of anger Kirk displayed in his quarters after the fact. I too have wondered if there wasn't something set in place for captains (or even senior officers) to help them come to grips with the lives lost on their watches. It would make sense, otherwise they'd wind up like Matt Decker, or Ron Tracy.
Anyway, I digress, but very, very well done to show the steps taken to deal with such a loss. And I'm sure the second letter was healing for Thompson's family, as well as Kirk.
Date: 15 Nov 2013 00:16 Title: The Key
Nice! I love these fill in stories that take place between episodes. This would have been great to see on film, but it would have probably taken up a whole act in a fast paced tv format. Nice interaction with McCoy, first with McCoy treating Kirk, then McCoy as the bartender, then a trusted friend. You have Kirk and McCoy down very well. Also nice that Kirk is reflecting on the loss of fallen crew. I like McCoys remark that they are in a tin can in the middle of a very hostile environment. Well done all the way around.
Date: 14 Nov 2013 15:54 Title: The Key
I well recall this episode, and then the dead girl is forgotten and they go on their merry way. But of course real life is never like that. And a casualty that traumatic would not just be something that the Captain and anyone nearby who had witnessed it, or had known her at all, would have just dismissed and shrugged at.
So you gave her a soul, and at least a bit of a personality. Well done.
Author's Response: Glad you remembered it. And, yes, alas; Thompson, like so many other red shirts, wasn't mentioned again. But I figure...this might have happened a lot, behind the scenes. The aftermath. TNG-era (TNG, DS9, VOY) and ENT all did a good job showing the aftermath on screen; I think they had the time to devote to it, or at least the sense to know that actions would inflict some damage to the characters. TOS, I feel like we have to read between the lines in some places. It certainly gives those of you who write TOS regularly a nice area to explore. I'm glad you enjoyed it. Thanks for the read and the review!