You must login (register) to review.
Reviewer: FalseBill Signed [Report This]
Date: 06 Oct 2013 15:37 Title: Chapter 1

Good choice to start in Captain McAfee sour mood march back to her Academy office. It clearly helps to establish her dark mood.
You do a job in a few words to paint a picture of her office. Having Jim turn up to apologise and show her that the cocky youth who beat her to centre seat of the Enterprise has matured into the leader who deserves that placement.

It did feel a real awkward cease-fire between two people who clearly have ultra-competitive about getting the same job.

Gracie finding the power to forgive, shows her maturity as well.

Though I must admit that it does feel just like Kirk to drop the hint hat she might be about to get her dream after all and then beam out without revealing anything.

Reviewer: MIck Signed [Report This]
Date: 26 Sep 2013 02:49 Title: Chapter 1

I could really feel for Grace now knowing her connection to Captain Harris, it made a great way for the reader to care about not only her, but Harris as well.  I could almost hear Shatner's voice as I read Kirk's lines especially and the end of the chapter.  

You must login (register) to review.