Date: 14 Feb 2015 18:55 Title: Chapter 1
I found this story delightful. Absolutely beautiful prose, and I liked how easily Spock and Uhura understood one another, even with just a look. The relationship between Spock and Kirk was also very well done. Good of Jim to concern himself about Spock's feelings in such situations, and the Vulcan did not deny that some emotional problems might arise at some future date. It shows how far their friendship has progressed.
Date: 27 Sep 2013 05:28 Title: Chapter 1
I loved this, for I see the evolution of the characters in STID, too. And I do see the paralells to their TOS characters, as well as their diversion points.
The descriptions of the planet were lovely, although I echo TS here in that there was a creepy element to it, but the undercurrent was profound sadness. Perhaps the main characters saw in this planet the fate that awaited Nibiru, had they not made that bold and decisive move at the beginning of STID. Sad, and bittersweet, yet compelling and lovely all at the same time.
Author's Response: I like it when readers bring up things I, as an author, hadn't even thought of; it's one of the best parts of reviews. I'd not thought about Nibiru and yet it makes perfect sense that this was what they were hoping to avoid there (and I'd always wondered if it wasn't actually Spock who wanted to save the Nibirans and pushed for the plan, and then in turn Kirk, because he considered Spock his friend, was willing to go along with it). Thank you for the review!
Date: 17 Sep 2013 01:20 Title: Chapter 1
Crazy amazing descriptions of the setting in this one. You painted the scene very well; it was incredibly easy to picture exactly what was being seen on the planet. The buildings sound like they would have been absolutely incredible structures with hundreds of colors. The aliens you created (and, I suppose, destroyed) sounded interesting as well, and it was very...hmm. Not sure what I'm trying to say; it wasn't depressing, it wasn't creepy. It was a very interesting scene, even hopeless almost, the way Kirk found them gathered to die together.
I agree with what's been said, the interactions between the characters were incredible. The transformation of Kirk between 2009 and STID seemed to start with a hint of a new, somewhat more mature Kirk coming to the fore, but this took it even further to show him very much aware of his role as the captain, not just another one of the grunts. The respect he held for the dead as well as the opinions of his crew (Spock urging the use of the probes, versus letting Kirk just go in to the building, for example) was a very different man than we were introduced to in 2009. And the concern he had for Spock showed not just that maturity, but also the friendship that was just starting between them. And yes, chess. A nice callback to the TOS guys to see in this. A very nice expansion to a WFW that I thought was a great beginning to a story, glad to see you took it and ran with it.
Author's Response: Thank you! I'm sad they didn't put chess in the movies somehow, so I'm glad that worked out as a re-introduction.
Date: 13 Sep 2013 18:56 Title: Chapter 1
Nicely done and I really got a feel here that these were the nuTrek versions of the characters we know so well. Not just because of the history here but also by the way they talked and behaved. Slight nuances which puts them apart from their Original Trek counterparts.
And Kirk's transformation from the brash explorer to a captain mindful of his crews' emotional well being was believable and well executed.
I liked it.
Author's Response: Thanks! I really wish they'd, you know, shown some of that adjustment in the more recent movie, but at least it gives me something to write about in fanfic.
Date: 13 Sep 2013 07:22 Title: Chapter 1
Ooh. This is both excellent and haunting. I love the percision of your descriptions. Not a word wasted or out of place; you paint the picture and let the reader draw the brushstrokes. The characterization was lovely, too; no one parodied or dumbed down, so all of them shine. Nice work!
Author's Response: Thanks SL. Even though it's light on plot, I like to do little character examination pieces like these for the freewrites.
Date: 13 Sep 2013 01:52 Title: Chapter 1
This was so much win. A subdued piece, but one with a lot of weight to it. You showed some growth that, I hope, the new movie will show us when it comes out next. Whatever the case here, the communication between Spock and Uhura, Kirk and Spock, were spot on. I could feel Kirk's emotions here, his concern, the thoughts he had. The ending made me grin ... Kirk and Spock engaging in some friendly chess.
Author's Response: Thanks for the review! *crosses fingers for new movie as well*
Date: 12 Sep 2013 21:24 Title: Chapter 1
Well Niobium, I did think your original WFW for this one has a solid scene piece but you’ve done a great job of portraying the more punk AOS/Nutrek version of Kirk via Uhura POV. I think you’ve done a good job showed he is slowly becoming the hero we know from TOS.
I felt this was an interesting idea to show a broken down civilization and their reaction to that civilization end. The use of the small glass shad to show his respect for the dead civilization was a nice image and then the fact that he also considered the impact on Spock with the closeness of Vulcan destruction.
Nice way to end it by focusing on the upcoming 3D Chess game between the two friends.
Author's Response: Thanks Bill! I was kinda disappointed that they didn't really show Kirk earning the captaincy in the first movie, so I've found myself trying to fill in the somewhat large gaps in his credibility (even if it is after-the-fact). Re: the survey itself, I'm happy all of that came through, because I wanted to look at the notion of archaeology that's not all about stealing dead civilizations' stuff, since that seems pretty counter to the notion of the Federation.
Date: 12 Sep 2013 15:57 Title: Chapter 1
I like how Jim is sensitive enough (and even Spock does not quite get it at first) to the fact that a lost civilization might affect Spock emotionally more than others.
The descriptions of the buildings, their interior structures and the doomed inhabitants - all of those were excellent. The mosaics were an inspired touch, and I love the fact that their writings were not found. After all, not everything is tied up in a neat little package at the end of every episode, despite what a lot of writers would have us all believe.
Author's Response: Thank you! I too get a little tired of 'conveniently we figured it all out', because it leaves so little for anyone to think about later on, so I've been trying to work that in here and there.
Date: 12 Sep 2013 11:02 Title: Chapter 1
The little snippet I first read was just an exploration of nuKirk's personality-but this is much more. A feeling of bonding between the two, Spock and Kirk, comes through in the end. Excellent.
Author's Response: Thanks muchly--I am an unabashed BFF writer when it comes to them (and Kirk & Uhura), so I'm happy to see it came through.